Saturday, May 06, 2006

Bad Bad Day!!!!

Excuse my language in the blinkie but it's just how I feel today! I'm am sooo glad this day is about over. I have tried so hard today to keep busy & cheer up but nothing works. Matt called this morning & that helped but he didn't have much time. I feel like my life,OUR lives are so unfair right now. I shouldn't complain I have so much to be thankful for but it's hard to see that sometimes through the tears. I keep telling myself this is only temporary. It works for the kids but I can't get it in my head. I don't have that much longer to go. I'ts half way over (hopefully) but days seem longer than ever right now. I support all troops especially my husband but I can't help but want him HERE! Am I being selfish? I certainly don't mean to be. I know that some things are worth fighting for but why my kids? Why me? Why my husband???????
Shewwww....ok I feel a little better now. Sorry for complaining so much but I just needed to vent a little.
~Court~

8 comments:

Courtney said...

It is ok to vent. I actually think it is better than keeping it in all the time. And I have been feeling the same way honestly. It is hard readjusting to him being gone again. Just hang in there. Like you said today is over and hey tomorrow is a new day so start it with a good attitude and you'll be surprised at how well it will go.....(even though that is probably one of the hardest things to do). Hang in there. We are all with ya.

Charla said...

Hey girl, sorry to hear you're having a bad day! Just remember hun, it's almost over. We're beyond the halfway mark now, it's all downhill from here! Remember what you told me, we'll do it together!! Don't feel bad for wanting Matt home, I feel the same way about Steve being gone! I told him one day, "I'm just ready to be selfish, I'll share anything with anyone except you, I just want you home!!" He told me that he really feels like they are making a difference there, that the people there really need them right now! And even though I need him and want him home too, it helped me a little to hear that they're not just wasting their time over there! They really are making a difference! Anyway, I understand how you're feeling and it's nothing to feel bad about, it's normal to feel that way! Just remember Court, it won't be long until we are both standing there at those gates, TOGETHER, watching Steve and Matt walk down that hill! I'm here for ya hun! I love ya!!!! Big Hugs!!
Charla

Sandra said...

Court you have every right to complain and every right to be upset. This is a tough situation and it downright SUCKS!!! No ands ifs or buts about it.

You will have some good days and then you'll have really crappy ones, and it's ok to be mad and resentful at those times. It's all part of the process and it just shows that you love him, if you didn't you wouldn't care that he's gone right?

Sucks being a military wife at times, but I know you're one tough lady and you'll get through this.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and Matt at this time.

Love ya,
Sandra

Britt said...

I too went through the why me phase while Wes was deployed. Many people just don't understand what it takes to be a military wife. You'll make it! You're almost there! You can do it! :) I'm so ill that Wes won't even have been home a year when he redeploys again. 2 thanksgivings, christmases, birthdays, etc. that he's missed in 3 years. We'll get through it girl. If you ever need a shoulder, I'm here!

Courtney said...

Thank you Courtney (love your name...he he he),Charla,Sandra & Britt! I know I can make it with girls like you on my side!

Faith said...

It is ok to have a bad day. Go listen to the song. It will make you feel better. By the way you have every single right to be upset. YOu know you are not alone. They tease you and tantalize you with a two week R&R so, you end up saying good bye again. :-) So, smile cheer up. We all want them home. Hopefully they will all be home sooner than later. :-)

Faith

kbug said...

Hi Courtney, I just found your site through another Courtney's site....lol. Anyway, I see that you're waiting for a soldier just like I am. Well, not exactly in the same way...my soldier is my youngest son. He's been in Iraq for 5 months now. I've found quite a few kindred spririts in the blogosphere...there are alot of us around. Anyway, I know how hard it must be for you sometimes, I see my son's wife go through the same thing...good days and bad days. But, we'll all make it through this deployment. Hang in there.

Glo said...

Sorry your having a bad day....Remember who you are girl and what an amazing job you done already.We don't have to much longer to go.Your Army and W-O-M-A-N. What a great unstoppable combination you are .Now you go girl,make us proud....HOOAH